Tuesday, July 17, 2007

More Evidence

More evidence that I will have to adjust my world view and see my little girl, who was born like two weeks ago, I swear; I was changing her overflowing diapers just MOMENTS ago, and she isn’t really seventeen AT ALL; for Pete’s sake on a popsicle stick, this can NOT be happening to me; I will have to start seeing her as something else entirely:

She is breaking our long standing tradition and she doesn’t want to go to a local bookstore at midnight this Friday and get the last Harry Potter and will thus fracture our streak of getting latest HP saga as it hits the shelves. We don’t dress up or anything seriously goofy (except that one time when I went as Hermione), we just get two copies of the book and race to see who can finish it first. She invariably wins, since I don’t have long stretches of time to devote to reading nothing but Harry Potter. I have to be semi-productive and will sometimes take breaks to sleep, eat or bathe, for example.

That sound you just heard? That was the sound of my heart breaking.

If anyone needs me, I’ll be in a dark corner listening to my extensive collection of The Cure, Dead Can Dance and The Smiths.

And NO, it doesn’t help that I got a sneak peek at the last Harry Potter book months ago.

Favorite Entries

If you are new around here, the following entries have been reasonably well received. You might want to peruse these.

• Help Wanted
• From the Office of Mis-directed Email
• A Word from the Small Person in the House
• RNT Product Review: Chocolate Mix Skittles Left Me Sterile!
• Jon’s Report Card circa… A Long Time Ago
• Dear Gratuitously Naked Conversationalist at the Gym:
• A Peek Inside the Writer’s Guild and Producers’ Negotiations
• We Regret the Error
• Letters from a Homeowner to His General Contractor
• What I Did There
• Hermaphrodite Administrative Assistants and Receptionists Need Not Apply
• Giving Me an IM Account Was Obviously a Huge Mistake
• Official Ransom Note Typography Vista vs. Mac OS X Shootout
• I Need a Real Hobby
• Beat Down
• Big Fat Lies
• True Love
• Now MY Ovaries Hurt
• Don’t Get Her Started
• Disturbing Trend
• Had to do it
• Mooshy stuff
• Ransom Note Typography End User License Agreement “EULA”
• Diva-licious!
• Just so we’re clear
• PETA may have a point

Holy Crap! Look at all this STUFF down here. It's awesome!

Really, I'm glad you made it down here. Almost no one ever comes down here. I'm like in a freaking dungeon down here. I get lonely. But not you. YOU made it all the way to the end of the page. For this I think I've a little crush on you. I don't know, is "love" to strong a word to use in this situation? Well, if it's not "love," then it's very strong "like." I'm totally in like with you for coming down here. You are awesome. Please love me back! I know, I know, I shouldn't be all needy, it's not attractive at all, but you don't know how it is to be stuck down here. Who scrolls all the way to the end of a page anymore these days? Anyway, thanks for shedding some light down here in the depths. I appreciate it. Shoot me an email and I'll send you a dollar, OK?

©2005-2008 Jon B. Deal All Rights Reserved. I'm not kidding around here, I know people who know other people who would be willing to beat you up or similarly infringe on your rights, should you happen to infringe on my rights.