Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Last Night I Dreamed I Ate a Marshmallow and When I Woke Up My Pillow Was GONE!

I’m very particular about pillow that I sleep on. Yes, I’m one of those people. I pack my own pillow when I go on trips. You got a problem with that?

I used to have the absolute PERFECT pillow, but sadly a few years ago it gave up the ghost. In reality, it fell apart. Disintegrated is more like it. Plus, it had a distinct “odor.” Not a horrible, putrid-no-shower kind of odor, but it smelled like me and no matter how many times I washed the pillow, it still kind of smelled odd. (This was before I’d discovered the modern miracle that is Febreeze™)

Anyway, I like my pillow to be lumpy. Lumpy as if the poor thing had the black plague and was covered in bulbous pustules. Only without any gross oozing. So a down pillow is right out of the running. My head smooshes those and I feel like I’m being suffocated. Fiberfill™ works great, but it’s hard to get the proper number of lumps in one of those. I’ve had to work pretty hard to maul one into shape since my last pillow bit the dust. I’m pretty happy with it now and it has been christened “Jon’s/Dad’s Pillow” and everyone in the Deal Family Compound knows not to mess with it.

Except Reha, who just sleeps on whatever is handy. Seriously, she can fall asleep on fluffy pillows, throw pillows, no pillow (mattress only!), a pillowcase filled to the brim with sticks, and my Special, Lumpy Pillow™, all with impunity. It’s all blessed sleep to her.

Last night she fell asleep on my pillow again and I didn’t have the heart to wrench it out from under her while screaming, “My pillow, my precious lumpy pillow! Get the HELL OFF my pillow, you doomed creature who can fall asleep two minutes after reclining!!”

I didn’t scream that, nor did I steal my pillow back. In the interest of matrimonial harmony, I just let it go and slept (rather failed to sleep) on one of the puffy atrocities that also lives on our bed.

I swear, my lumpy pillow fetish is THE ONLY WIERD THING about me.

heh.

Jon scribbled this mess on 06/13/06 at 07:23 AM, best we can tell it fits in the category of Regular Post. This many folks had something to say about that, The permanent home of this entry is here: Link

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