Sunday, October 23, 2005

Lagoon-a-thon

Oh my goodness on a popsicle stick, could yesterday have BEEN any more busy? No, I don’t think so. We are trying to clean everything out of the garage, both so we can FINALLY (after three years) put a car in the garage and so we can finish up the remodel and also try and de-crap our lives. We did a garage sale and actually earned a tasty bit of cash. Carrie made out like a bandit selling collector dolls my mother-in-law willed to her.

First of all, people who frequent garage sales are a breed unto themsleves. They get up VERY VERY early. Which makes sense; they want to hit the sales before everything has been picked over. But people please, when we spend $55 on an ad in the paper that says the sale starts at 8 am, we don’t mean, Sure, come knock on our door and ring our bell to ask about the desk that’s for sale at SEVEN damn THIRTY in the morning. Really, the ad didn’t mean that. I promise. And I don’t care that you are down from Centerville, we are just UP from bed and I’m not going to dicker about stuff before the appointed time. Mmm, K? Thanks.

Second, people bargain weird. That quilt was for sale for that price and we did know it was stained, so take it or leave it, fraulein. If the stain doesn’t come out after you wash it at home, those are the breaks, my dear. You’re getting a $300 quilt for $25, so just pipe down, will ya?

Third, memo to the Management of Lagoon. The Bat sucks. Tear it down and put something better in its place. I’m sure you spent a ton of cash on it, but it’s just embarrassing. I can roll down a hill with more thrills that that thing. Put another one of those Blast-off and Re-entry tower things in its place. Those are incredible, though I’m terribly sorry about losing bladder control when the Re-entry ride started that time. And the Spider? Genius. I’m not a roller coaster fanatic or connoisseur by any means, but a coaster with a car that spins independently as it’s also traveling up and down, etc. is a kick in the head. We went twice, even though the lines are a bit long. And I’ll just add the same comment that anyone would make: $6.71 for a mini-corny-dog combo meal is a tad too much. But if you promise to use the money to tear down The Bat and build another something that will make me lose sphincter control, I’ll buy a few more next summer.

When you have to stand on line for what seems like days in order to get on a ride that lasts approximately 4.5 seconds, you can get to know that people in front or behind you. For instance, while waiting to get on the Colossus, Lucas and I talked about physics with the couples behind us and I assured that one nice lady that she’d fall just as fast as her skinny husband because of the gravitational constant. Only Newtonian physics need apply at Lagoon. Also, that hot chick IS going to break up with you, Don. You keep telling her she’s wrong about stuff and treat her like she’s stupid and one day in the near future I suspect she’ll figure out she was REALLY wrong about you. I don’t have a ton of experience with that sort of thing, but even I know that.

Favorite thing from yesterday I overheard while on line for The Spider: “Yeah, we made out, but we don’t like each other, so it doesn’t count.”

Jon scribbled this mess on 10/23/05 at 10:44 PM, best we can tell it fits in the category of Regular Post. This many folks had something to say about that, The permanent home of this entry is here: Link

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