Monday, June 18, 2007

Father’s Day 2007

When you have young children, it is usually up to the spouse to nudge, cajole, and threaten the kids to do nice things for their parents. (This is also true of birthdays and holidays as well.)

Since we all know that I kind of suck, but Reha is amazing. She whipped those little guys into shape this year and I had a lovely day yesterday. Wonderful breakfast and a great relaxing rest of the day. I only got cards from Ellis and Jonah, because Carrie is still in Japan and doesn’t know what day it is here and Lucas showed his love for me by not shooting me in the face with his automatic Nerf dart gun. (Man, that thing is cool.)

And I got cute cards!

Images pops and in case you still can’t read it, it says:

“June 16, 2007

Dear Dad,
Happy Father’s Day. What’s your best guess of what’s held in this present? 1. How is your day going? 1. ___Pet Elephant___________ 2. ____new car,____fusion reactor____________. I like it when you talk in funny voices. I remember when you played Champions, Return to Arms with me. Thanks you for helping me with my science fair project.

Love,
Jonah”

My best guesses are underlined.

Images pops ups and in case you still can’t read it, it says:

“June 16, 2007

Dear Dad,
Happy Father’s Day. You’re cute. Everything you do is fine with me. I remember when playing with you at the grocery store while Mom was shopping. You were grabbing me onto my hands and jumping me up. [sic.] I liked it. It was so fun. I like it when you play with me. I sleep with you because Mom sleeps with you. I like sleeping with you because you are nice.  (ed note: she ends up in our bed almost every night after starting out someplace else, like the couch, chair, or a bar) You are smart. I am happy with you.

Ellis.”

“I am happy with you.”

Nothing wrong with that.

Now I’m all verklempt and weepy.

Y’all talk amongst yourselves, I need a tissue.

Favorite Entries

If you are new around here, the following entries have been reasonably well received. You might want to peruse these.

• Help Wanted
• From the Office of Mis-directed Email
• A Word from the Small Person in the House
• RNT Product Review: Chocolate Mix Skittles Left Me Sterile!
• Jon’s Report Card circa… A Long Time Ago
• Dear Gratuitously Naked Conversationalist at the Gym:
• A Peek Inside the Writer’s Guild and Producers’ Negotiations
• We Regret the Error
• Letters from a Homeowner to His General Contractor
• What I Did There
• Hermaphrodite Administrative Assistants and Receptionists Need Not Apply
• Giving Me an IM Account Was Obviously a Huge Mistake
• Official Ransom Note Typography Vista vs. Mac OS X Shootout
• I Need a Real Hobby
• Beat Down
• Big Fat Lies
• True Love
• Now MY Ovaries Hurt
• Don’t Get Her Started
• Disturbing Trend
• Had to do it
• Mooshy stuff
• Ransom Note Typography End User License Agreement “EULA”
• Diva-licious!
• Just so we’re clear
• PETA may have a point

Holy Crap! Look at all this STUFF down here. It's awesome!

Really, I'm glad you made it down here. Almost no one ever comes down here. I'm like in a freaking dungeon down here. I get lonely. But not you. YOU made it all the way to the end of the page. For this I think I've a little crush on you. I don't know, is "love" to strong a word to use in this situation? Well, if it's not "love," then it's very strong "like." I'm totally in like with you for coming down here. You are awesome. Please love me back! I know, I know, I shouldn't be all needy, it's not attractive at all, but you don't know how it is to be stuck down here. Who scrolls all the way to the end of a page anymore these days? Anyway, thanks for shedding some light down here in the depths. I appreciate it. Shoot me an email and I'll send you a dollar, OK?

©2005-2008 Jon B. Deal All Rights Reserved. I'm not kidding around here, I know people who know other people who would be willing to beat you up or similarly infringe on your rights, should you happen to infringe on my rights.