Thursday, September 04, 2008

RNT Mission Statement

I’m currently redesigning the Ransom Note Typography site. I’m also taking the opportunity to re-think some things.

Hence, I present you with the shiny and new Ransom Note Typography Mission Statement:

1) At Ransom Note Typography, we are committed to presenting our loyal readers with quality content on a regular basis.

The same standard of poorly written, cheaply executed and deeply flawed ideas will continue. On the same unpredictable, irrational and irregular schedule I’ve enjoyed of late.

2) The reader is the most important member of the Ransom Note Typography Team. Without you, we wouldn’t be here.

I have readers! Suck it, lesser blogs! And, you can’t spell “reader” without stealing a few letters from “team,” now can you?

3) Ransom Note Typography strives to open new markets and garner as many new readers as possible while still maintaing our high standards.

Why can’t I be dooce or kottke, too? And don’t say it’s because they have talent and I’m basically a hack. That’s been said to me a million times already, OK? And for the love of all that is holy, will someone please click on those goofy ad things over there? I have a kid in college now! Come on!

4) Ransom Note Typography will never stoop to being evil, merely for a piece of your page views.

Submit this to Digg! Reddit! StumbleUpon! Please, pretty please on a bacon flavored cherry lollipop, tell all your friends and family members about me! Subscribe in a feed reader! I’m pathetic and emotionally needy and desperate for the attention and validation of strangers on the Internet! The therapy isn’t helping!

5) Ransom Note Typography is “kid friendly” and will never go blue and seek the cheap laughs of comedic vulgarity.

Shit, we’d never do that.

Posted by Jon on 09/04/08 at 06:04 PM

  1. Thank you for teaching me a new word.  I wasn’t hip to the term “blue” comedy.  I appreciate your avoidance of comedic vulgarity. It’s f**king disgusting.

    Posted by Csquaredplus3  on  09/04/08  at  07:21 PM

  2. I’ve lurked on your site, but never commented so I guess you could consider me new-ish. Or kind of creepy. Creepy in the sense that I never say anything. I just read and laugh. Thanks. Now, go mow your lawn.

    Posted by jenboglass  on  09/04/08  at  08:01 PM

  3. Why can’t I be dooce or kottke, too? And don’t say it’s because they have talent and I’m basically a hack. That’s been said to me a million times already,

    I tell myself this every time I try to do one of those “slice of life” type posts that most bloggers effortlessly write. I accept my hackery.

    Posted by Kathy  on  09/05/08  at  03:11 AM

  4. You’ll be happy to know I clicked on all the ads. Even the one that sent me to AmenMe.com, the Christian site.

    It scared me.

    Posted by Annie  on  09/05/08  at  07:03 AM

  5. Everytime I post about poop, I feel my mother die a little inside.

    Posted by Jerilyn  on  09/05/08  at  10:28 AM

  6. I for one like your blog just the way it is.

    Posted by Terri  on  09/05/08  at  08:33 PM

  7. Mmmmm...bacon. You’ve been on my reader for awhile now...do I still get the lollipop?

    Posted by Geri C  on  09/06/08  at  10:40 AM

  8. #2 is classic.

    Posted by Michael  on  09/07/08  at  07:49 PM

  9. I, for one, am happy the therapy isn’t working!  It may result in you not writing anymore!

    Posted by NerdGirl  on  09/07/08  at  08:36 PM
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Holy Crap! Look at all this STUFF down here. It's awesome!

 

Really, I'm glad you made it down here. Almost no one ever comes down here. I'm like in a freaking dungeon down here. I get lonely. But not you. YOU made it all the way to the end of the page. For this I think I've a little crush on you. I don't know, is "love" to strong a word to use in this situation? Well, if it's not "love," then it's very strong "like." I'm totally in like with you for coming down here. You are awesome. Please love me back! I know, I know, I shouldn't be all needy, it's not attractive at all, but you don't know how it is to be stuck down here. Who scrolls all the way to the end of a page anymore these days? Anyway, thanks for shedding some light down here in the depths. I appreciate it. Shoot me an email and I'll send you a dollar, OK?


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