Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Gunning for a Time Slot on ABC in the NEW Fall Line-up

We can’t go three weeks without some kind of drama here in the Deal family compound, I swear to Zoraster. One of our 16 children — in this case, through NO fault of his own, he would like to make sure I point out to the Intarweb — Jonah (7) fell and landed on something that split his head open last night. He’s a bit vague about exactly what happened. He doesn’t know why he fell and he’s unsure of what he fell on that sliced him open and he gets quite testy when you ask him what happened. “I DON’T KNOW! I FELL AND I STARTED TO BLEED, OK?!” This is the same person that yells at us after he’s thrown up all over our bed.

The drama unfolded just as my lovely wife walked in the door. Well, he’d had enough lead time to bleed all over his supremely patient, calm, cool and relaxed under pressure baby-sitting older sister and on the living room carpet (which we’ll be replacing later this year, hallelujah). Reha (mother) promptly decided that the gash was worthy of stitches and they scooted off to the Emergency Room.

Once I got home I used this crisis as a perfect excuse to continue to procrastinate and not work on the remodel. Plus I had to make dinner for the remaining 13-14 children. (I keep losing count). And do the dishes. And play house will Ellis. OK, the playing house thing was totally my idea, but the doll house she got for Christmas is way cooler than our place. I’d snap that thing off the market if it were real and had a decent sized backyard.

Jonah was a trooper through the whole experience, after he screamed his initial screams. They used this cool numbing stuff in the E.R. on the wound so he didn’t need a lidocaine shot in his head. And they didn’t do stitches. Instead he’s Frankenstein’s monster and has five staples in his noggin. Way cooler than stitches. He’s very excited to show them off tomorrow at school. And just because you know you also want to see them, I herewith present photographic evidence that sometimes even cute little boys can fall down “FOR NO APPARENT REASON!!” and “STOP ASKING ME HOW IT HAPPENED!!”

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Holy Crap! Look at all this STUFF down here. It's awesome!

 

Really, I'm glad you made it down here. Almost no one ever comes down here. I'm like in a freaking dungeon down here. I get lonely. But not you. YOU made it all the way to the end of the page. For this I think I've a little crush on you. I don't know, is "love" to strong a word to use in this situation? Well, if it's not "love," then it's very strong "like." I'm totally in like with you for coming down here. You are awesome. Please love me back! I know, I know, I shouldn't be all needy, it's not attractive at all, but you don't know how it is to be stuck down here. Who scrolls all the way to the end of a page anymore these days? Anyway, thanks for shedding some light down here in the depths. I appreciate it. Shoot me an email and I'll send you a dollar, OK?

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