Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Scouting Out Locations for my Eventual Draft Dodging

So I am going to Canada next week. Big press check. Big job. Big money. Big pressure. And I’m going to L.A. to help move the L.A. office on Monday and then flying straight to Toronto and then back to good old boring SLC on Friday. Let’s take bets on whether they let me back into this country. Press check every 2 hours on Wednesday and Thursday. Yes, all day and all night. Whee!

So unless I can convince Reha to let me steal her laptop for the duration of the trip, I might not be doing much posting. You may be either relieved or horrified at that thought. I’m going to guess relieved.

And how cool is it that Toronto’s airport code is YYZ? And yeah, obviously I’m a dork, because, yeah, I know the story behind that song. Sometimes you can’t outrun your past.

Speaking if running, anyone know a decent jogging route close to the SoHo hotel in Toronto?

Jon scribbled this mess on 03/29/06 at 12:13 PM, best we can tell it fits in the category of Regular Post. This many folks had something to say about that, The permanent home of this entry is here: Link

What’s a Four Letter Word for Gross Incompetence?

So Andrew Card resigned the other day. Which got me thinking… everyone of consequence on Bush’s team is associated with a four letter word.

Condelezza RICE.

KARL ROVE (and he gets a DOUBLE four letter-wording, for having first and last name! Go Karl! Go Karl!)

George BUSH

PAUL Wolfowitz

JOHN Bolton

and of course…

DICK Cheney.

This administration shall always be known as the presidency that is closely associated with four letter words.

Oh, and this is the funniest thing I’ve see in a long time. “I’m a Christian. I don’t hate gays. I just hate your faggoty ways.”

Jon scribbled this mess on 03/29/06 at 09:52 AM, best we can tell it fits in the category of Regular Post. This many folks had something to say about that, The permanent home of this entry is here: Link

Monday, March 27, 2006

Run! It’ll Kill Us All!

Remember way back when I said that I was going to be “featured” in an ad and I did a photo shoot?

Well, the shots we took back then didn’t really turn out. There was an impossible shadow across my face and we couldn’t just re-do the shoot, because, well, I was in the hospital.

Anyway, we re-did the whole thing a week or so ago and though the subject leaves a lot to be desired, it’s a pretty cool thing regardless.

And look at the size of my forehead! It’s The Devourer of Worlds! Hide the kids, everyone take cover, run for your lives! THE FOREHEAD IS COMING!

click for larger version.

Jon scribbled this mess on 03/27/06 at 11:59 AM, best we can tell it fits in the category of Photos Regular Post. This many folks had something to say about that, The permanent home of this entry is here: Link

Saturday, March 25, 2006

World Travelers, We Are Not

Me: “So I might have to go to Toronto for a press check in a week or so.”
Lucas: “Oh! I want to go! Take me!”
Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, but you’re short. You’re funny looking. And you smell kind of bad. And they won’t let you passed the border into Canada.”
Lucas: “Ah. So, you can’t really go, either.”

It’s like living with Don Rickles or something.

Jon scribbled this mess on 03/25/06 at 08:21 PM, best we can tell it fits in the category of Regular Post. This many folks had something to say about that, The permanent home of this entry is here: Link

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Watch That Weight

Reha and I came to an agreement over the weekend. She would begin a weight loss program (rhymes with Schmeight Smatchers) and if I’d do the program with her she’d begin running with me. I’m all about exercise right now and she’s always been much more inclined toward a diet solution. So we are coming to a middle ground. It’s all about the compromise, my friends. Now, FOR THE RECORD, I think she looks GREAT and wouldn’t change A THING about her, but she says she’s bugged and wants to wear all her old “skinny” clothes. Whatever. I’m not going “there” with that, OK?

Also, yes, I’m still running every other day. I got really busy in Feb. and had to take a few weeks off, and I’m technically a few weeks behind on my quest to be ready for the SLC Marathon, but hopefully I can make up the training before the big show in June. I stopped doing the log on the site, because, well, it seemed odd and kind of pretentious. And I REALLY would like Spring to arrive here and all the snow to melt. I’m incredibly tired of the treadmill and I’m too much of a wimp to run while the temperature is below the freezing point of carbon dioxide.

So I’d just like to go on record as saying that I’m hungry. And I’m not really happy about being hungry.

SS (AKA WW) has you take a gander at your weight, height, etc. and from there they assign you a certain number of points you can eat in a day. Different foods have different point values. Broccoli= 0 points, eat all you want. Oatmeal= 2 points, easy there sonny. Snickers Bar=like, 50 points and you can only smell one from a distance of thirty feet. You get the picture.

Anyway, I’m totally relying on Re to let me know the point values of all the food I’ve eaten and she tells me how many points I have left. I’ll do the program with her, but I’m way too cheap to spring for materials of my own. She told me yesterday that I got 36 points in a day and that the Powers That Be at SS (WW) say that you MUST use all your points in a day. Otherwise your body will go into famine mode, your metabolism slows down to a crawl and you start to horde fat. Or something like that. Dire predictions if you have points left! Anyway, you have to use all your points, even if it means taking a bite or two of a sinful Snickers at the end of the day.

I went all day yesterday and I had about 15 points left. Party on, Dude! I ended up having some sort of treat, can’t even remember what it was. But it didn’t actually get rid of all my points. I think I had about 8 or so left. Oh well.

Today I go about keeping track of my food intake, so I can dutifully report in the evening what I’ve eaten and have Reha give me a thumbs up or down. Since yesterday I had so many points left over, I even got myself a cookie at lunch. Splurge City!

When I came home and we started tallying everything up Reha realized that she’d read the chart wrong. I only have 26 blessed points in a day! And that damn cookie put me in the hole by 2! I’m at negative 2! Hellfire!

And I went running tonight and now I’m like a starved hyena out on the Savannah.

Just wait ‘til next week and she starts running with me. Revenge is a dish that is best served… cold? No… on a running shoe? No, that’s just plain dumb...by running your opponent into the ground? Good, but it doesn’t really flow off the tongue…

Oh never mind, it was on honest mistake. And how could I stay mad at her anyway? She’s introduced me into a whole new world of counting and weighing my food! It’s fun!

Jon scribbled this mess on 03/22/06 at 12:15 AM, best we can tell it fits in the category of Regular Post. This many folks had something to say about that, The permanent home of this entry is here: Link
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